so I would like to talk about peace and you know there was a time when my mind was extremely restless so naturally as a spiritual Seeker I was trying to find the answer how to how to be peaceful how to Simply rest how to be without wanting to do something and I found all kinds of spiritual methods on how to stop the mind and you have to know that my mind wasn't just thinking a little bit it was an enormous energy in this mind and it was constantly producing like two or three different voices that are communicating with each other and that had an effect on the body and it was just it was just crazy and I would just like to share how I got out of it um there's no way but there's there's a pointing in a way we could say because when I say there's no way what I mean is there's no method at least in my experience there was no method that was helping me to get out of this restlessness but of course I tried all the methods you know focus on the breath and you know all the different methods and it didn't work it was just for me it felt like I'm suppressing my thoughts I got more focused my mind was more focused it was my mind was able to be without thoughts for longer periods of time but it was an unnatural silence there was still someone there that is suppressing the thought that that took effort so I was not looking for that I was looking for a way of being without effort this feeling of being at home so I was frustrated at some point I said I'm not no longer going to care about meditation I'm just going to sit down I don't care about Awakening peace Enlightenment if I'm going to attain anything I was just sitting down in this corner and at this time I told myself I'm just going to think I'm just going to think for half an hour and that I will allow the feelings to be as they are if conflict is going to appear let it be there so there was my first Epiphany I was just sitting there and thoughts appeared many thoughts inner conflict and I felt extremely uncomfortable because because I I allowed myself to simply be as I am but for half an hour I was not allowed to you know look at my phone interact with people do things drink coffee do stuff like that and it was extremely uncomfortable but I felt peace at the end of it I was able to see clearly how this enormous energy she slowed down by itself I didn't have to do anything no method so I kept doing this of course it wasn't a gradual process but at some point I noticed that I'm Not The Thinker so I was I was just there and I didn't I didn't say don't think or do think I was just there and the thoughts kept coming so at some point it just became clear that there is no thinker that is thinking thoughts it is simply the Mind activity that is running by itself it is the conditioning that is simply doing what it does so then it became clear there is no ey that is doing stuff there was simply the Consciousness that is aware of the conditioning and the conditioning was doing or repeating what it was doing all the years before repeating all the stories um activating all the feelings you know that it knows but from this point on it was clear that it was just conditioning of this body mind and I'm just the I'm the unconditioned Consciousness that is aware of it so it was not by choice but I had no choice but to identify as an observer The Observer that is unconditioned and aware of the body mind's conditioning so I was just sitting down and the Observer was just observing the condition of the conditioning of the body mind so thought appears something negative something that's triggering and the the Consciousness is not doing something about it there's no there's no conflict you know because who's the one that's focusing on the breath is still the ego trying to focus on the breath because the ego thinks I'm going to have an advantage in my life if I don't think so much so I'm going to concentrate on the breath that takes effort so it's still the ego but Consciousness sees that the one that's trying to change the thought is still the ego so when you are trying to change the the fact that the mind is thinking then that means you're identified because you think that activity is you and you don't like that you are this way but it's not you you are simply observing as as pure Consciousness observing this mind activity so and also you see how the body reacts you know the body reacts with feelings like when you feel rejected and you and you feel uh pissed and triggered and the negative stuff you know and slowly the whole past is just falling off there conditioning will remain to some extent of course but when you see that the body mind is is thinking and doing all by itself and the program that is running is observed by something that is not programmed then the body can relax and the mind will come to a natural silence an effortless silence then there was just this silence and it reminded me of being a mountain because a mountain doesn't it's not here for a purpose it's just here because it is being that's all that's the whole purpose of of a mountain it's just there no past no future just resting in this Stillness which is already the true nature so it all comes down you know Awakening is not hard what's hard about it is to confront what is not you the the conditioned mind because it feels painful so that was just my experience um some people might be successful with you know concentrating on the breath but my way of meditation is no way of meditation is just being with this body mind and observing it not doing anything to change the body mind the way of it the way it's thinking and the feeling I'm not changing it it's just pure observation no conflict pure allowing and gradually over time it will become clear that you not this you're not the conditioning you are the Stillness that's peace that's this this feeling of warmth that you you may have had in childhood you know everything is okay it's just this I don't have to pretend to be someone I'm not it's just I don't have to believe in things that will save me you know because they imply that I'm not safe but I am and I'm not saying that this party is safe all the time I'm talking about about the psychological self the psychological self is talented is talented in pretending that it's not safe even though it's very comfortable chilling in bed you know that's a talent to act as if something is not right even though everything's right everything everything you know nothing's missing it's this psychological self so the trick to put it in some few simple words is to confront without conflict without conflict whatever will appear when you're just being in silence and forget everything you've heard about spirituality and Buddhism and Hinduism and you know in that moment that does not matter the mind will cling to an idea of what it means to be enlightened and then it's looking for it and it's putting it into the future and it's not here and uh the mind will try to understand what it means to be at peace and it does not understand peace but when the Mind realizes that it is basically there is no thinker in the thought that the Thinker is thinking it's just the mind talking to itself and is constantly trying to find out what peace and Liberation means and when it when it realizes that it that it has no chance to find this out then it will just collapse and then there is real peace it's just the Consciousness the being feeling like a mountain and pure observation of the body mind and the world of all that appears and you know when I said that it feels like this warmth that you may know from childhood do not turn that do not give that information to your mind because your mind will look for that and postpone it really just just confront the darkness first don't be afraid of the darkness you know negative feelings trauma past events you know that happened and are still not uh fully you know healed confronted confronted confronted every day don't try to use a method to get rid of it just confront it become comfortable with it until it is just okay you know and you realize in the process of it that it's not you you're just watching you are watching the body mind and when that phase is over that Darkness then there's just this Clarity that you know you're watching the body mind and it's little you know Tendencies to do stupid stuff but that's okay because it's not you and then there's peace naturally without having to believe in something higher the goodness will just flow through you the body mind you you you can give that goodness a name if you want to but it's just about realizing that the mind will never understand this the mind is the conditioning the separate self is the conditioning and it will never understand peace feeling at home feeling satisfied it will never understand it so when you are in silence you're just observing its attempt to become enlightened it's attempt to awaken the mind's attempt to understand what it means to be free and you're not you're not artificially trying to create distance you you don't have to be scared of the activity in the mind it can be very close to it almost really embrace it and even if the mind is thinking for 10 minutes 20 minutes in a row still embrace it don't try to you know because the what the mind will tell you is that you know your Consciousness you should you should take a step back and you should you know observe it from a distance but that's an artificial distance the distance is already here when you are just allowing the mind to be active you don't have you know Consciousness is Untouchable you cannot do anything the Mind cannot do anything to make Consciousness Untouchable you can come as close to the thought as you want and Consciousness is still Untouchable so you can fully Dem mind the artificial eye the artificial mindmate Observer and the thought they can become one it's like and there's this full allowance and there's no conflict it's just there's this it's no conflict but the Consciousness that you are which is always observing which is always unconditioned in in the position of this Consciousness which is what you are you will observe the body mind and its programming conditioning and slowly the conditioning will become less and less and less but that's not the goal the goal is to be so there's no goal if you turn it into a goal you will never you know I think you understand there's no goal there's no future Enlightenment or only the mind is interested in it Back To Top